Tuesday Morning QB

Well you know, you gotta take into consideration the Monday Night Football game too.

So first thing's first - who wants to hop on for a ride on biron's forecasting dick? The Eagles are respectable at 4-3 and a lock for the playoffs given the NFC's deficiency in - you know - winning games, but how 'bout Donovan? Sure he's not playing bad, but he's not exactly posting the MVP-type number I think everyone and their brother expected him to post. His QB rating is down 17 points, he's thrown 1 less pick then he did all of last year and he's got an injury that is going to absolutely cripple him by the season's end as far as pain goes. Last year if I remember correctly the Eagles were undefeated, and you could make a case for them this year to be the same...with a healthy McNabb. Why isn't McNabb healty?

Biron "Nostrafuckindamus" M

Anyway, back to things that won't anger our resident mormon.

Did anyone else just lose interest in the football game last night after Roethlisberger completed the first 2 passes on the final drive? I was talking to my co-worker, and it appears as if we both fell asleep watching the game at the exact same time, which was when Quincy Morgan caught that second pass and ran out of bounds. But hey, helluva job by the Ravens to hang in there on prime time with a team devoid of any notable talent whatsoever.

Does anyone else giggle when they say "Quincy" to themselves? Or is that just me? When Quincy Carter was in the spotlight in Dallas, and this is very cruel btw - he has an oversized tongue and I know it's just not right to say shit about that. Believe me, I hate myself for doing it, but every time I hear "Quincy" it's immediately translated into "Quinthy", and I instantly go into impression mode in my mind. Hey - least I admit it, jackass.

I never got around to saying it, but I love seeing pics of quarterbacks during their bye weeks. Kyle Orton of the Bears of quickly moving up my list.

I think Chad Pennington's done, that is - unless he's traded to a west coast offense. In one of the most bizarre moves I've witnessed outside of Bengaldom in the last few years, new Jets Offensive Coordinator Mike Heimerdinger installed an offensive scheme that consisted mainly of a vertical passing attack. Well, Pennington couldn't throw a great deep ball pre-rotator cuff, much less post, and then the Jets swap their best downfield threat in Santana Moss for a 2-year past-his-prime Laveranues Coles. It's like....duhhhhh. No wonder Herm Edwards has the most sound bites in the NFL year after year.

Speaking of the Jets misfortunes, Falcon's QB Matt Schaub is as good as gone come season's end...and likely becoming a Jet. Ok ok, that's just conspiracy theory, but someone in NY has to figure out that Chad isn't what you need if you intend on throwing the football more than twice a game. If you don't intend on doing so, you had better have Michael Vick - so in essence, the 2 teams mentioned here mesh quite well, hence the above.

If the Houston Texans don't take an offensive lineman with their first pick of the 2006 NFL Draft, then Commissioner Paul Tagliabue needs to seriously consider taking the franchise back. It's almost to a point to where you have to turn away watching Texans highlights, thinking to yourself that Carr really isn't a great scrambler - he's just running for his dear life and thus gains the adrenaline-speed thing. Upon the ridiculous pick the Texans will make, the NFL could possibly move them to Los Angeles, where they rumor to be relocating something there every season anyway. Hey, how's the "Los Angeles Californians" sound? No...how bout the "Los Angeles Californians of Anaheim?"

How awesome are the latest Burger King commercials? There's nothing like seeing this guy take the place of players in great plays across the NFL, and just last week Kenny Mayne did a feature on him in the "The Mayne Event." Now normally here would be where I link a streaming commercial or something of that nature, but I don't have one. So, I leave you a snippet of the man who ran onto the field at the end of the Bengals/Packers game Sunday...

By the way, that guy did plead innocent.

Speaking of my Bengals, I'm not sure if I ever posted it on here but I said 10-6 at the beginning of the season, and I'm still holding strong on that despite a 6-2 start. 11-5 would be nice, I just don't see it happening. While I'm on the subject of Bengals predictions, I also said at the beginning of the season that our first pick in '06 would be SS Darnell Bing out of USC. I still like the pick and think he's what we need, but at this point I'm willing to welcome CB Jimmy Williams out of VaTech as well - that guy makes my nips glass-cuttingly hard.

If the Packers think they have a future QB in Aaron Rodgers - wait, I think ESPN clarified Cal's history plenty during draft day.

Uhh...

Oh - I'm not sure why the Rams offense changes so much with Marc Bulger at the helm. I mean, the Rams are 4-4 on the year and are likely to win their division in the NFC (No Fuckin' Competition) as well, but every time you see Bulger go down you have analysts on all major networks saying, "the Rams will look to give the ball to RB Steven Jackson more", and then note how good Jackson is. My question, perhaps this is obvious to me, but "WHY NOT GIVE HIM THE BALL REGARDLESS?" I apologize for caps, but that's how it sounds in my head. When Bulger is out, Jackson gains 200 all-purpose yards. When Bulger's in, Jackson gains 80 - now you tell me...would you rather your RB gain 200 or have Bulger throw for 300? Call me traditional, but it's brutally obvious to me.

I still maintain that Cadillac Williams is a better RB then Ronnie Brown, although week by week Brown's proving he's not the workout warrior I had him pegged as. I figured Ricky Williams would be cutting into Brown's playing time more than he has, but Saban's really holding tough on getting Ronnie carries - good for him. Cadillac's banged up, or dare I say, "Cadillac's in the shop" like every fucking announcer has said in the past 3 weeks, but he's been used pretty heavily here early in the season. Hopefully resting these minor injuries reintroduces Michael Pittman back into John Gruden's offense for the sake of the Bucs, Carnell Williams and my fantasy team after losing Deuce McAllister.

I gotta say I was wrong on Plaxico Burress as well. He's dropped the "Overpriced Piece of Shit" label from my book that no one cares about to just the "Asshole" label. I still maintain he offensively interferes on every ball thrown his direction, but really - who doesn't? I'm sure if Peter Warrick could manhandle the guy guarding him because of his sheer size, I'm sure he would've done the same.

Ahh, poor Peter. I said that as soon as he got sent out to Seattle, and as recently as when I got my wife pregnant for the first time.

Until next time...